Finding love can be a difficult and frustrating journey.
We all long for someone to share our lives with, but the path to finding that person can be full of disappointments, heartaches, and confusion.
As Christians, we want to know what God has to say about finding love.
What does He think about dating, marriage, sex, and relationships?
Let’s look at what the Bible teaches us about love and how it can guide us in our search for a partner.
Love begins with God
As believers, we understand that the best example of true love is God’s love for us.
In 1 John 4:19, it is written, “We love because he first loved us.”
Therefore, the first step towards finding love is to establish a relationship with God, understanding and accepting His love and allowing it to flow through us.
Love is not just a feeling, it’s an action
It’s easy to get caught up in the romanticized idea of love being a “feeling,” but the Bible teaches us that love is much more than that.
In fact, it’s a verb – an action that requires effort and sacrifice.
In 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, it says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
This verse gives us a clear picture of what love looks like, which is not just a warm and fuzzy feeling, but a daily choice to love others in practical ways.
Love is not always easy
Just like any other relationship, love has its ups and downs.
In Matthew 5:44, Jesus instructs us to “love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”
This is one of the most difficult teachings of Jesus, but it’s also one of the most powerful.
Loving those who hurt us is not easy, but it’s what sets us apart as believers and allows God’s love to shine through us.
God’s timing is perfect
As humans, we often want things to happen on our timeline, but God’s timing is always perfect.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 tells us, “For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.”
This verse reminds us that there is a time and a season for everything, including finding love.
We should trust in God’s plan for our lives and have faith that He will bring the right person into our lives at the right time.
Above all, love God and others
In Matthew 22:37-39, Jesus sums up all the commandments with two simple statements: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.”
These verses remind us that love is not just about finding the right person, but it’s also about loving God and loving others with everything we have.
God’s design for marriage
The Bible tells us that God created marriage as a sacred union between one man and one woman.
In Genesis 2:24, we read, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
This verse teaches us that marriage is meant to be a lifelong commitment between two people who become one in every way, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
God’s standards for relationships
God sets high standards for our relationships.
In 2 Corinthians 6:14, we read, “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?”
This verse warns us not to pursue romantic relationships with non-believers.
It tells us that our core values and beliefs should align with our partner’s, so we can grow together in our faith and build a strong and godly relationship.
God’s advice for dating
While the Bible doesn’t give us specific rules for dating, it does offer us valuable principles to follow.
In 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, we read, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
These verses teach us that love is a selfless and sacrificial act.
We should seek to love and serve our partners with kindness, humility, and patience, putting their needs above our own.
God’s plan for sex
Sex is a beautiful and intimate gift that God has given us to enjoy within the context of marriage.
In 1 Corinthians 6:18-20, we read, “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
This verse tells us to flee from sexual immorality and to honor our bodies, which are temples of the Holy Spirit.
We should save ourselves for marriage and use our sexuality to glorify God and strengthen our bond with our spouse.
Seek First the Kingdom of God
In Matthew 6:33, we are encouraged to “seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”
This includes our quest for love. When we focus on our relationship with God first, we set ourselves up for success in our relationships with others.
Seeking God’s will in all things, including our romantic relationships, helps us avoid pitfalls and heartache. We must trust that God’s timing is perfect and that he has a plan for our lives.
Guard Your Heart
Proverbs 4:23 advises us to “guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”
As we seek love, we must be diligent in protecting our hearts from unhealthy relationships.
This means being intentional about the people we allow into our lives and avoiding relationships that are not built on a foundation of mutual respect, honor, and love for God.
We should strive to love others as God loves us, with a sacrificial love that puts the other person’s needs before our own.
Lean on God
In our search for love, it is easy to become discouraged and disheartened.
When we feel this way, we must remember that God is with us always and that he understands our struggles.
We should turn to him in prayer and seek his comfort in times of loneliness.
Psalm 27:13-14 reminds us that “I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord.”
Finally, we must trust in God’s plan for our lives, even when we don’t understand it.
He knows our desires and needs, and we can trust that he will lead us to the right person at the right time.
We must have faith that God’s plans for us are good and that he has our best interests at heart.
Romans 8:28 states that “we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
As Christians, our perspective on love is shaped by our faith and trust in God.
We are called to seek first his kingdom, guard our hearts, lean on him in times of struggle, and trust in his plan for our lives.
These principles can guide us in our search for love and help us build meaningful and lasting relationships.
We can take comfort in knowing that God is with us every step of the way and that he desires good things for our lives.
May we always seek love with a heart that is receptive to his voice and a steadfast trust in his love for us.