How Do I Know If God Wants Me to Be With Someone?

by Sister McCook

One of the most important decisions we will ever make in our lives is choosing a spouse.

It is a decision that will impact us for years to come and can change the course of our lives.

As Christians, we are called to seek God’s will in all areas of our lives, including our relationships.

We want to know that the person we are with is the one God has destined for us.

So, how do we know if God wants us to be with someone?

Let’s look at some key factors to help you discern if your relationship is in line with God’s plan for your life.

Pray and Seek God’s Will

The first step in discerning God’s plan for our love lives is to pray and seek His guidance.

We should ask God for wisdom, clarity, and direction in our relationships, and be open and receptive to His response.

It’s important to take the time to listen to God’s voice, whether it comes through prayer, Bible reading, or the counsel of wise Christian mentors.

God wants us to make good choices in our relationships, and He will guide us if we ask Him to.


While compatibility is not the only factor to consider in a relationship, it is important.

We should make sure that we share common goals, interests, and values with the person we are considering.

If we do not have these things in common, our relationship may struggle to survive.

We should also make sure that we are not compromising our own values or beliefs in this relationship.

Confirmation from others

We should seek counsel from wise, trusted individuals in our lives who may have insight into our relationship.

These people could include pastors, mentors, and close friends.

We should listen to their advice objectively, taking all their thoughts and opinions into consideration.

It is important to remember that just because someone doesn’t agree with our choices doesn’t mean they are against us.

Sometimes, others can see things more clearly than we can, and their advice should not be taken lightly.

God’s Word

We should always make sure that our relationships are in line with God’s Word.

We should seek to honor God in all that we do, including our relationships.

We should also make sure that the person we are with is following God’s Word as well.

If we are not equally yoked, our relationship can be a source of strife and turmoil rather than one of joy and peace.


This peace can come in the form of a calm assurance that we are on the right path.

It can also come from the absence of drama or chaos in our relationship.

When we are with the person God has chosen for us, we will feel a deep sense of peace that will carry us through any challenges we may face.

Look for Alignment with Your Values

As Christians, we share certain core values, such as a commitment to faith, honesty, integrity, and compassion.

If we meet someone who shares these values, it may be a sign that God is bringing us together for a reason.

Conversely, if we find ourselves compromising our values or beliefs in a relationship, it may be a sign that this person is not right for us.

Pay Attention to Peace and Joy

When we’re in alignment with His will, we often experience a sense of peace and joy in our relationships.

If we feel anxious, stressed, or unhappy when we’re with someone, it may be a sign that they’re not the right fit for us.

On the other hand, if we feel calm, content, and joyful around someone, it may be a sign that God is leading us towards them.

Seek Confirmation

Discerning God’s will in our love lives is not always easy, and it’s important to seek confirmation from others who know us well and love us.

This could be a trusted family member, friend, or mentor who can provide wise counsel and perspective.

It’s important to be open to feedback and willing to listen to the opinions of others, as they may have insights that we haven’t considered.

Ultimately, it’s up to us to make the final decision, but seeking confirmation from others can be a helpful step in discernment.

Surrender to God’s Will

If we pray and seek His guidance, and if we’re willing to surrender our desires and plans to Him, then we can trust that He will guide us in the right direction.

This may mean that we end up with the person we’re currently with, or it may mean that we remain single, or that we meet someone else down the road.

The key is to trust that God’s plan is perfect, and that He is leading us towards His best for our lives.

Choosing the right person to spend the rest of our lives with is a decision that should not be taken lightly.

As Christians, we are called to seek God’s will in all areas of our lives, including our relationships.

By taking these factors into consideration, we can ensure that our relationships are in line with God’s plan for our lives.

May we always seek Him first in all that we do, trusting that He will guide us down the paths He has chosen for us.

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