What Does The Bible Say About Kissing

by Sister McCook

Love is the greatest force in existence. There is a strong basis for this claim however, because “God is love”, and the greatest force in existence is God. This satisfies the equation.

It is this same love that originates from God that we find broken into different categories depending on the situation that brings the communication of it.

The Different Types of Love

Love has been classified into segments; from three, to four, to even eight. Let’s however see it split into eight categories these include;

  1. Agape (God-kind of unconditional love)
  2. Phileo (affectionate love between friends)
  3. Eros (romantic love)
  4. Philautia (self-love)
  5. Storge (familiar love)
  6. Pragma (enduring love)
  7. Ludus (playful love)
  8. Mania (obsessive love)
A heart shape tree

Looking at the classes of love above, I guess we understand why some just limit them to three or four; because most of them look like very similar to the other.

Now, we see that there are different kinds of love that humans interact with on a daily basis, but our main focus will be on the relationship/romantic love (phileo); this is the kind of love that the married couple enjoys as you rightly guessed.

couple in love kissing

But it’s not only the married couple that interacts with this love; it is also found among dating or courting couples. Not saying that they are only limited to this kind of love, but it’s more like a two-color coat that you can turn in or out.

What this means is that for a couple they experience all of these forms of love at different times, and in fact, control the way and the kind of love they wish to channel at any particular time.

married couple hugging and kissing

That’s how it works for humans, only God truly has the ability to feel only agape towards us at all times, because honestly, he couldn’t feel any of the others; it is not relatable to him.

Types of Love Relationships

Back to couples, and specifically the unmarried, dating couple. Everyone knows that definitely they feel some kind of love, which is the reason why they are together in the first place.

What nobody knows is what dimension of love is driving a spouse at any particular instance of time; do they just feel unconditional love, or they are experiencing a romantic kind of love at the moment, etc.

couple holding hands

This is the reason why the Bible has restrained us to the kind of love we should feel especially when we are not yet married, and it’s clearly not eros.

At least, the Bible makes it clear to flee fornication and so there is no debate on this, however, another touchy subject is whether kissing before marriage is wrong?

Square pieces of board spelling love

When we say kissing, of course we do not mean the “holy kiss” prescribed by Paul the apostle in 2 Corinthians 13:12, no, this goes way beyond that. It is an expression of “love” between a male and a female as God made it.

Is Premarital Kissing a Sin

It is not limited to the married couple however but is also an act that the unmarried may use to restate their love and commitment towards each other.

A couple kissing in spring

But is this action biblically correct for the unmarried couple? Or how far does the bible ask us to go when we’re not within the confines of marriage?

Here’s what the bible says:

“Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. – 2 Timothy 2:22 NIV

While this passage does not outrightly have the word “kissing” in it, it is safe to assume that it is between the lines since it is also a product of youthful lusts.

A couple kissing in sunset

We are able to derive this because the Greek word translated as ‘flee’ used here means ‘to avoid doing something’, so it’s something you have control over.

Also, the word translated as ‘lusts’ means ‘strong passions and emotions’ in Greek; I think kissing should rightly fall under this category as well. So, this is a warning against the feelings and emotions that the youth experience at their young age.

We can all agree that the youthful age is one that is encompassed by all manner of temptations and trials.

Two hands joined to form a heart

The reason that the youth is restricted from even a premarital kiss is not because it is not an expression of love, but because this act may lead to bigger things that we are trying to avoid. So the bible says:

”It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable…” – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4 NIV

‘Immoral’ means to be ‘not moral’. While some may believe that it depends on the intent of your heart, how much power have you mastered over your body?

boy and girl hugging smiling and kissing

It is a step in the right direction to avoid what may be uncontrollable in the nearest future. So, let us love truly and purely with the kind of love that is holy. Wait till you are bound by marriage when it is legal before God and before men.

Bible Verses About Kissing

The following are some of the Bible verses that talks about kissing.

And as soon as the boy had gone, David rose from beside the stone heap and fell on his face to the ground and bowed three times. And they kissed one another and wept with one another, David weeping the most. – 1 Samuel 20:41 
And whenever a man came near to pay homage to him, he would put out his hand and take hold of him and kiss him. – 2 Samuel 15:5 
But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. – Galatians 5:16 
Coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.” – Mark 7:22-23 
Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. – Proverbs 27:6 
Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. – 1 Corinthians 6:18
For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 
Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ greet you. – Romans 16:16 
Greet one another with the kiss of love. Peace to all of you who are in Christ. – 1 Peter 5:14 
Kiss the Son, lest he be angry, and you perish in the way, for his wrath is quickly kindled. Blessed are all who take refuge in him. – Psalm 2:12 
Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine; – Song of Solomon 1:2 
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. – Hebrews 13:4 
Now as soon as Jacob saw Rachel the daughter of Laban his mother’s brother, and the sheep of Laban his mother’s brother, Jacob came near and rolled the stone from the well’s mouth and watered the flock of Laban his mother’s brother. Then Jacob kissed Rachel and wept aloud. And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father’s kinsman, and that he was Rebekah’s son, and she ran and told her father. – Genesis 29:10-12 
Oh that you were like a brother to me who nursed at my mother’s breasts! If I found you outside, I would kiss you, and none would despise me. I would lead you and bring you into the house of my mother— she who used to teach me. I would give you spiced wine to drink, the juice of my pomegranate. – Song of Solomon 8:1-2 
One of the Pharisees asked him to eat with him, and he went into the Pharisee’s house and took his place at the table. And behold, a woman of the city, who was a sinner, when she learned that he was reclining at table in the Pharisee’s house, brought an alabaster flask of ointment, and standing behind him at his feet, weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears and wiped them with the hair of her head and kissed his feet and anointed them with the ointment.

Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him, for she is a sinner.” And Jesus answering said to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” And he answered, “Say it, Teacher.” … – Luke 7:36-50 
Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. – Colossians 3:5 
Steadfast love and faithfulness meet; righteousness and peace kiss each other. – Psalm 85:10 
Then Samuel took a flask of oil and poured it on his head and kissed him and said, “Has not the Lord anointed you to be prince over his people Israel? And you shall reign over the people of the Lord and you will save them from the hand of their surrounding enemies. And this shall be the sign to you that the Lord has anointed you to be prince over his heritage. – 1 Samuel 10:1 
Then they lifted up their voices and wept again. And Orpah kissed her mother-in-law, but Ruth clung to her. – Ruth 1:14 
Whoever gives an honest answer kisses the lips. – Proverbs 24:26 
You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. – Luke 7:45 

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